Friday, August 30, 2013
Jordan Tate
Jordan Tate is a screenwriteress who has had some success in the horror genre. One of her screenplays has resulted in a vampire film short and she is plugging away on new projects.
Thursday, August 29, 2013
The Dark Knight (2008) with comment
is the single most misreviewed movie of this year (2008) thus far. All too many movie reviewers are pandering to what they believe their readers want to hear, rather than what they actually believe. As a result, what is actually a movie with a confusing plot and a tendency towards speechifying, especially in its last half hour, has been hailed as one of the greatest movies of the year, if not this decade thus far. Why has The Dark Knight been so widely labeled a great movie by the critics? Basically because movie reviewers, particularly critics for print publications such as newspapers, have been pandering to what they believe that their readers want to hear. Since the conventional wisdom is that The Dark Knight will be a blockbuster, the critics want to get on the “right side” of the public and so they write these pandering reviews that overlook the problems with The Dark Knight. Why are the critics engaging in this behavior? Newspapers are downsizing and dropping their in-house movie reviewers and are either replacing them with syndicated writers or not even running movie reviews at all. Casualties of the recent downsizing trend include Terry Lawson of the Detroit Free Press and Michael Wilmington of the Chicago Tribune. A big reason for this trend is the increasing belief that movie reviewers are irrelevant as far as the movie going public is concerned. Flicks denounced by the critics score big at the box office while films that win critical praise bomb out. As a result, the critics are praising movies that they think will attract huge crowds so that they can “prove” their relevancy and as a result, keep their jobs. While a better movie overall than Batman Begins, The Dark Knight suffers from the same basic flaws as its prequel. The plot is poorly thought out and has several improbably moments such as the Joker being able to escape at least 3 different times and in hard to believe ways each time. The acting is average at best & the script is not much better than okay. If Heath Ledger were still alive, practically nobody would be singling out his performance as the Joker as being Oscar worthy. Ledger’s Joker is lame and inferior to Cesar Romero’s Joker from the mid-1960’s TV show Batman and the 1966 movie version of the same show. About the only saving grace for The Dark Knight is the fact that its first 2 hours is so fast paced that it flies by so much so that you would almost swear that substantially less time had elapsed. Too bad the last half hour is loaded with characters making speeches to each other and the like that causes the movie to suddenly drag. Like Batman Begins before it, The Dark Knight is basically a perversion of the original Batman created by Bob Kane. As such, it should be avoided by all those who read and respected Batman in the comic books. As for those pandering print movie reviewers, if all they can do is praise the movies that they think are going to become hits, and trash the flicks that they believe are going to bite the dust, then they richly deserve to become an endangered species, if not altogether extinct. This entry was posted on Friday, August 1st, 2008 at 6:25am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed. 2 Responses to “The Dark Knight Review Rough Draft” ben says: August 12, 2008 at 8:14pm wow… I have to say that I strongly disagree with your consensus. First, the best reviewers never cater to what they think people will perceive. Any critic can stand on his own opinion regardless of its popularity. And calling Heath’s performance lame… I have to say I was skeptical going in and have never truly been a fan of the actor. Nor did I feel it necessary to base my opinion of his performance upon the sentiment of his death. You watch him and you don’t see Heath Ledger. You see the joker. A deranged man with a creepy demeanor and a moral compass that points to its own north. If you can’t find yourself getting lost in his performance then maybe you need to take on a new hobby. It may have not been the most riveting plot but it was a very entertaining movie that did not fit the traditional ‘action movie sequel’ mold. I think that may be why you did not like it. It was different, and you are one of the simple minded individuals of the viewing public that is addicted to the same old formulaic performance/production duo that doesn’t know what to do with something that is actually novel. So before you begin your conspiracy theories as to why the critics aren’t on the same page as you, maybe you should take a step back and ask yourself what did they pick up that went over your head?
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
The Ruins (2008)
Scott Smith is both an up and coming author and filmmaker. His novels are landmarks in the development of contemporary American fiction. The film versions of his works are also very good. The 1998 film adaptation of his novel A Simple Plan is generally regarded as one of the single greatest crime dramas of the last few decades. Naturally, Smith decided after this triumph to enter the field of horror fiction to prove that his skills were not limited to crime fiction. Among the end results of Smith’s new interest in horror writing are both the novel The Ruins and the movie adaptation of the same name. The Ruins is about the downside of visiting tourist resorts such as Cancun, Mexico. Some friends visit Cancun and after a while they get bored. They decide to explore the countryside and come across an ancient Mayan temple. There, they encounter an evil that has lurked at the temple waiting for some nice, juicy victims to wander by. The Ruins is a great horror suspense film. The acting and direction are decent and it has excellent special effects. However, the movie has nudity that is all too pointless. There is simply no reason to include nudity in this movie. Despite this drawback, The Ruins is the scariest movie of the year thus far. It is also the most suspenseful. The vines scene is especially scary and suspenseful. The original novel was a great scary and suspenseful read. Given the fact that the writer of the screenplay is also the author of the original novel, you would expect that the movie were also be every bit as scary and suspenseful as the novel. Your expectations are all richly rewarded by this hair raising movie that will leave you clutching on the edge of your seat in the most terrifying movie event of the year thus far. The main problem is that it has nudity that like nudity in so many American movies made since the 1970’s is completely pointless and is simply not needed. On the other hand, the bad guy killer in The Ruins is not one of those seemingly immortal characters out of the slasher flicks. Instead, he was a relatively ordinary fellow who the audience could relate to. This is a most entertaining and suspenseful movie that the audience will well worth find worth the $10 or so cost for tickets.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006)
Of all the movies that constitute the Fast and the Furious series, the third installment entitled “The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift” is the single best one. Whether or not that is much in the line of praise is squarely in the eye of the beholder. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift opens with a teenager named Sean Boswell (played by the 24 year old Lucas Black who clearly does not look like a teenager) who has gotten himself in big trouble with the law. The police have videotape of the incident and they can put him in juvenile hall with the other, ummm, teenagers. However, the district attorney’s office strikes a most improbable plea bargain with Sean’s mother in which they agree to deport Sean to Tokyo to live with Sean’s estranged father. Upon arriving at Tokyo, Sean Boswell discovers that things are rather different than what he expected. For one thing, everyone in Tokyo that he encounters speaks perfect English irregardless of their educational background. Likewise, all of the teenagers that he encounters are not played by teenaged actors, nor do they look like actual teenagers. Additionally, he soon finds some kindred souls at his new school who are similarly reckless and who share the same love of urban racing that he has. One of these friends is even a token black, so the diversity angle is covered. Once Sean Boswell has made some friends amongst the Japanese youth, he gets introduced to one of the more idiotic Hollywood cliches. This is the bit about the instant expert who upon discovering a native tradition, an outsider who is the subject of a movie immediately knows more about the subject than any of the natives and is immediately more proficient in doing the native tradition than any of the natives. Movies where this cliche is most prominent include “Gymkata,” “The Challenge,” “The Last Samurai,” and the TV miniseries “Shogun.” In the case of this flick, the native tradition in question is called “drift racing.” This entails driving your car sideways at high speed, often skidding at the same time. In other words, Sean Boswell has gone from law breaking in America to breaking the law in Japan. Eventually, Sean winds up in even bigger trouble than ever. This leads to a most unusual solution. A drift race between Boswell and his adversary with the loser being forced to leave Tokyo forever. Surprisingly, Sean Boswell’s father thinks that this is an excellent idea and commits himself to helping soup up his son’s racing car for the big event. The end result of all this is a flick that is incredibly goofy and ridiculous. It works in keeping the audience entertained despite all of the implausibilities in it. The movie is every bit as much a summer fun flick as the two previous “Fast and the Furious” movies. Despite the sum total of the goofiness, or perhaps even because of the goofiness and implausibility, “Tokyo Drift” comes well recommended as a movie to rent and perhaps even purchase.
Living the Life (2000) With Comments
Living the Life (2000) With Comments
Throughout history, Hollywood has taken many great works of literature and literally trashed them, making horrible movies out of them. The same is also true of adaptations of lesser works of fiction. One novel in the latter category is Lynne Ewing’s 1998 young adult novel “Party Girl” the rights for which were bought by a movie company that proceeded to make the subject of this review that was allegedly based on Ewing’s work.
Living the Life starring Jay Hernandez and a bunch of untalented hack actors and actresses has almost nothing in common with Ewing’s novel except that it is set in a neighborhood in a rundown area of Los Angeles. Not only does the movie have a different name than the novel, but most of the character’s names are different and the plot is almost completely different. Whereas Ewing’s novel was about a teenage girl whose life revolved around partying, Living the Life is about some hispanic teenage girls whose aspirations are limited to becoming prostitutes, strippers and drug dealers. One of the girls also wants to become a professional hitwoman and be not only the girlfriend of the leader of the local brutal youth street gang, but also the 2nd in command as well.
The focus of the movie is on gang banging and street violence in general. Up and coming actor Hernandez is only in the movie a short time and hardly recognizable with the goatee they have him wearing. The plot of this movie, to the extent that you can actually discern a plot, is stupid and unrealistic. The producers of this movie evidently envisioned this movie as being a teenage girl ganster flick. This movie’s advertising focused in on the fact that the girls go to a nightly dance competition, but in the movie that aspect is only a silly subplot that only wastes more time and serves no purpose. These dance competitions feature teenage girls dancing in what look like the kind of outfits that prostitutes wear which makes you wonder just what kind of people were sponsoring them in the first place.
One strange aspect of this movie was that these girls were not even old enough to graduate from high school and yet, except for the gang leader’s girlfriend, they were all pregnant. And yet they partake in street gang violence and dance competitions whilst preparing to give birth down the line. One can only wonder just what the producers were smoking when they thought this angle up.
One partucularly striking aspect of this movie was the lack of older men as positive role models. For the two main female characters, there was no father, uncle, cousin, no man who espoused constructive ideas. Instead, there are gangbangers who abuse their own girlfriends. This helps to make for a dull movie because in order to have drama, you need conflict between competing ideas.
Living the Life is poorly made, poorly directed and except for Hernandez, poorly acted. The cinematography is especially poor in this movie. The colors are bleached out.. The picture is never crisp, and always seems out of focus. The colors fade and blur instead of being deep and rich. This movie is also poorly edited. At one moment, a girl’s hand is cut bleeding profusely, the next moment, she is as good as new without even a scratch on her even though she lives a life of almost daily violence with her boyfriend’s street gang.
The sound editing in this movie is especially bad. The dialogue levels go from clear to inaudible and sometimes crackle. Oftentimes the soundtrack music is played so loud you cannot understand what the actors are saying. Just why anyone would release a movie that is in this condition is incomprehensible.
Living the Life is a movie to avoid like the plague.
This entry was posted on Saturday, February 26th, 2005 at 7:35am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
12 Responses to “Movie Review: Living the Life (2000)”
emily says:
August 3, 2005 at 10:27pm
well….let me just point out some of your mistakes. ONE girl in that movie was pregnent…just one…..and of course there was a lack of “positive male roll modles”…dont you realize what type of people this movie is trying to show? and the main “gang leader” if thats wut u would like to call him, Pocho…he is no ones boyfriend. Ana, the girl who dies, HAS a boyfriend from another gang. and Kata, the other main girl, is more like his sister then anything. perhaps u should have paid more attention to this moive. in my opinion, i liked it. and so did my friends. but also, that might be because we too have very few “positive male roll modles” and we too are in gangs. maybe we can relate to some things in this movie. and you right, the actors werent well known…and ur right, most of them werent all that great. but its good to see a flim where the main person isnt living their happy little life in hollywood. dont knock someone elses view on movie making…and believe it or not, some people actually liked this movie. thanks.
Kayleigh says:
August 26, 2005 at 6:46pm
i love this movie! who ever rated this movie was COMPLETELY WRONG!! there was only one girl pregnant, just like emily said.. nd yea there life was limited to drugs, and gang-bangers stuff but thats because it has a main purpose! I liked this movie, and too a few of my freinds it inspired them not to join a gang cuz they see what really does happen.. so whoever wrote critics on this is STUPID
Devon says:
February 19, 2006 at 12:42pm
Oh yea… I liked the music in this movie alot… But when I went to look for it online I couldnt find it…The song is called Danger Zone…Its the first song the girls dance to…Its sounds like it would be chinese at the beginning.
Charles Rector says:
February 20, 2006 at 7:06pm
So if you are “completely in love with this movie” that means that nobody can disagree with you? What a small mind you must have.
Michelle says:
July 27, 2006 at 12:32am
I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH!! ITS MY FAVORITE SO FAR, AND STILL!! AND LIKE SOMEONE SAYD THEY COULDNT FIND THE SONG DANGER ZONE, ME EITHER. I LOVE THAT SONG. THE RATERS ARE DUMB AND WRONG. JUST BECAUSE IT DEALS WITH THAT KIND OF STUFF DOESNT MAKE IT A BAD MOVIE, A LOT OF PEOPLE LIVE THAT WAY, IITS A WAY OF LIFE. I BEEN THROUGH IT. WOULD THAT MAKE ME A BAD PERSON?? ANYWAYS, I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS MOVIE WHETHER YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH ME!!!!
KaRiNa says:
August 16, 2007 at 6:43pm
who ever critisized this movie is so WR0NG! This movie is the best! it shows wat real life is all about! and seriously the critic him self needs to watch the movie him self…he dont even got the facts straight…well i love this movie && it look like lots of people liked it! so so stop talking bad!
DiANA [&] KiARA --HOUSTON,TX says:
September 3, 2007 at 12:04am
EXCUSE ME MR.”MOViE CRiTiC” WHERE DiD U GET UR COLLEGE DEGREE FR0M TO BE TRYiNG TO ANAYLZE A MOViE THAT U WOULDNT COME CLOSE TO UNDERSTANDiNG. THE HARDSHiPS OF STREET GANG MEMBERS, iTS NOT ONLY ABOUT SEX, DRUGS, AND CRiME. iTS A LiFESTYLE THAT SOONER OR LATER TEACHES YOU WHO U TRULY ARE, SOMETHiNG THAT A BOOK CAN’T TEACH YOU.SO WHY DO U THINK U KNOW HOW REALiSTiC iT iS? YOU DONT HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE ON THE SiTUATiON TO BE SPEAKiNG YOUR MiND FREELY ON iT. WHAT LED YOU TO BELIEVE THAT THE DIRECTORS WERE SMOKING SOMETHING, JUST BECAUSE YOU NEVER EXPERIENCED THE HARDSHIP THEY DELT WITH DOESNT MEAN iTS A FANTASY WORLD. OBVIOUSLY YOU DIDNT PAY MUCH ATTENTION TO THE MOVIE AS WELL , BECAUSE THE ONLY ONE THAT WAS PREGNANT WAS ANA AND NOT THE OTHER FEMALES. THiS iS WHAT THE SUPPOSLY “MOViE CRiTiC” SAiD WHICH MADE HIM CONTRADiCT HiMSELF… “…except for the gang leader’s girlfriend, they were all pregnant” ALSO LET ME STRESS TO YOU THAT YOU SHOULDNT BE THE ONE TO SAY WHATS RIGHT OR WRONG IN A CERTAIN SITUATION, EVERYBODY HAS THEIR OWN MENTALITY, JUST BECAUSE ITS NOT LIKE YOURS DOESNT MAKE IT WRONG. THE ACTORS EVEN THOUGH THEY ARENT KNOWN, THEY DiD A GOOD JOB OF PORTRAYiNG THE CHARACTERS LiFESTYLE! G00D DAY! ~”iF U STARE UP AT THE STARS LONG ENOUGH ANYTHiNG SEEMS POSSiBLE”~
pamela says:
June 25, 2008 at 5:20am
whoever wrote this review must be some white junkie whos never personally seen the life and srtuggle of a young woman coming up in a barrio. i thought this movie captured what being in a gang is like and all the crap that comes along with it. this movie is a modern Mi Vida Loca and it represented a chola’s lifestyle.
so for the person that wrote this shitty critique, get your head out of your ass and learn about the real LOCA culture watch the movie again (and this time pay attention) you are not watching The fucking Hills.
LP says:
December 16, 2008 at 3:34pm
Hey, i really liked this movie a lot….i really really want to find that stupid danger zone song! but i cant anywhere, i know a lot of other people said they couldnt but if u know what its called and where i can get it. let me know!
Someone says:
March 15, 2009 at 8:03pm
Gooood movie!!
who sings that song danger zone?
does anyone know where I can get the soundtrack??
Jus Me says:
August 21, 2009 at 11:13am
Ugh!! I just need to find that damn song “Danger Zone”!! It’s drivin me crazy!!!if u know it plz send it to rishacharley@yahoo.com
stephanie says:
September 18, 2009 at 9:41pm
omg i need to no the song danger zone!….its been months since ive been wanting to know…one of my fav song in the movie….
email me at fanimoreno_246@hotmail.com
Throughout history, Hollywood has taken many great works of literature and literally trashed them, making horrible movies out of them. The same is also true of adaptations of lesser works of fiction. One novel in the latter category is Lynne Ewing’s 1998 young adult novel “Party Girl” the rights for which were bought by a movie company that proceeded to make the subject of this review that was allegedly based on Ewing’s work.
Living the Life starring Jay Hernandez and a bunch of untalented hack actors and actresses has almost nothing in common with Ewing’s novel except that it is set in a neighborhood in a rundown area of Los Angeles. Not only does the movie have a different name than the novel, but most of the character’s names are different and the plot is almost completely different. Whereas Ewing’s novel was about a teenage girl whose life revolved around partying, Living the Life is about some hispanic teenage girls whose aspirations are limited to becoming prostitutes, strippers and drug dealers. One of the girls also wants to become a professional hitwoman and be not only the girlfriend of the leader of the local brutal youth street gang, but also the 2nd in command as well.
The focus of the movie is on gang banging and street violence in general. Up and coming actor Hernandez is only in the movie a short time and hardly recognizable with the goatee they have him wearing. The plot of this movie, to the extent that you can actually discern a plot, is stupid and unrealistic. The producers of this movie evidently envisioned this movie as being a teenage girl ganster flick. This movie’s advertising focused in on the fact that the girls go to a nightly dance competition, but in the movie that aspect is only a silly subplot that only wastes more time and serves no purpose. These dance competitions feature teenage girls dancing in what look like the kind of outfits that prostitutes wear which makes you wonder just what kind of people were sponsoring them in the first place.
One strange aspect of this movie was that these girls were not even old enough to graduate from high school and yet, except for the gang leader’s girlfriend, they were all pregnant. And yet they partake in street gang violence and dance competitions whilst preparing to give birth down the line. One can only wonder just what the producers were smoking when they thought this angle up.
One partucularly striking aspect of this movie was the lack of older men as positive role models. For the two main female characters, there was no father, uncle, cousin, no man who espoused constructive ideas. Instead, there are gangbangers who abuse their own girlfriends. This helps to make for a dull movie because in order to have drama, you need conflict between competing ideas.
Living the Life is poorly made, poorly directed and except for Hernandez, poorly acted. The cinematography is especially poor in this movie. The colors are bleached out.. The picture is never crisp, and always seems out of focus. The colors fade and blur instead of being deep and rich. This movie is also poorly edited. At one moment, a girl’s hand is cut bleeding profusely, the next moment, she is as good as new without even a scratch on her even though she lives a life of almost daily violence with her boyfriend’s street gang.
The sound editing in this movie is especially bad. The dialogue levels go from clear to inaudible and sometimes crackle. Oftentimes the soundtrack music is played so loud you cannot understand what the actors are saying. Just why anyone would release a movie that is in this condition is incomprehensible.
Living the Life is a movie to avoid like the plague.
This entry was posted on Saturday, February 26th, 2005 at 7:35am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
12 Responses to “Movie Review: Living the Life (2000)”
emily says:
August 3, 2005 at 10:27pm
well….let me just point out some of your mistakes. ONE girl in that movie was pregnent…just one…..and of course there was a lack of “positive male roll modles”…dont you realize what type of people this movie is trying to show? and the main “gang leader” if thats wut u would like to call him, Pocho…he is no ones boyfriend. Ana, the girl who dies, HAS a boyfriend from another gang. and Kata, the other main girl, is more like his sister then anything. perhaps u should have paid more attention to this moive. in my opinion, i liked it. and so did my friends. but also, that might be because we too have very few “positive male roll modles” and we too are in gangs. maybe we can relate to some things in this movie. and you right, the actors werent well known…and ur right, most of them werent all that great. but its good to see a flim where the main person isnt living their happy little life in hollywood. dont knock someone elses view on movie making…and believe it or not, some people actually liked this movie. thanks.
Kayleigh says:
August 26, 2005 at 6:46pm
i love this movie! who ever rated this movie was COMPLETELY WRONG!! there was only one girl pregnant, just like emily said.. nd yea there life was limited to drugs, and gang-bangers stuff but thats because it has a main purpose! I liked this movie, and too a few of my freinds it inspired them not to join a gang cuz they see what really does happen.. so whoever wrote critics on this is STUPID
Devon says:
February 19, 2006 at 12:42pm
Oh yea… I liked the music in this movie alot… But when I went to look for it online I couldnt find it…The song is called Danger Zone…Its the first song the girls dance to…Its sounds like it would be chinese at the beginning.
Charles Rector says:
February 20, 2006 at 7:06pm
So if you are “completely in love with this movie” that means that nobody can disagree with you? What a small mind you must have.
Michelle says:
July 27, 2006 at 12:32am
I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH!! ITS MY FAVORITE SO FAR, AND STILL!! AND LIKE SOMEONE SAYD THEY COULDNT FIND THE SONG DANGER ZONE, ME EITHER. I LOVE THAT SONG. THE RATERS ARE DUMB AND WRONG. JUST BECAUSE IT DEALS WITH THAT KIND OF STUFF DOESNT MAKE IT A BAD MOVIE, A LOT OF PEOPLE LIVE THAT WAY, IITS A WAY OF LIFE. I BEEN THROUGH IT. WOULD THAT MAKE ME A BAD PERSON?? ANYWAYS, I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS MOVIE WHETHER YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH ME!!!!
KaRiNa says:
August 16, 2007 at 6:43pm
who ever critisized this movie is so WR0NG! This movie is the best! it shows wat real life is all about! and seriously the critic him self needs to watch the movie him self…he dont even got the facts straight…well i love this movie && it look like lots of people liked it! so so stop talking bad!
DiANA [&] KiARA --HOUSTON,TX says:
September 3, 2007 at 12:04am
EXCUSE ME MR.”MOViE CRiTiC” WHERE DiD U GET UR COLLEGE DEGREE FR0M TO BE TRYiNG TO ANAYLZE A MOViE THAT U WOULDNT COME CLOSE TO UNDERSTANDiNG. THE HARDSHiPS OF STREET GANG MEMBERS, iTS NOT ONLY ABOUT SEX, DRUGS, AND CRiME. iTS A LiFESTYLE THAT SOONER OR LATER TEACHES YOU WHO U TRULY ARE, SOMETHiNG THAT A BOOK CAN’T TEACH YOU.SO WHY DO U THINK U KNOW HOW REALiSTiC iT iS? YOU DONT HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE ON THE SiTUATiON TO BE SPEAKiNG YOUR MiND FREELY ON iT. WHAT LED YOU TO BELIEVE THAT THE DIRECTORS WERE SMOKING SOMETHING, JUST BECAUSE YOU NEVER EXPERIENCED THE HARDSHIP THEY DELT WITH DOESNT MEAN iTS A FANTASY WORLD. OBVIOUSLY YOU DIDNT PAY MUCH ATTENTION TO THE MOVIE AS WELL , BECAUSE THE ONLY ONE THAT WAS PREGNANT WAS ANA AND NOT THE OTHER FEMALES. THiS iS WHAT THE SUPPOSLY “MOViE CRiTiC” SAiD WHICH MADE HIM CONTRADiCT HiMSELF… “…except for the gang leader’s girlfriend, they were all pregnant” ALSO LET ME STRESS TO YOU THAT YOU SHOULDNT BE THE ONE TO SAY WHATS RIGHT OR WRONG IN A CERTAIN SITUATION, EVERYBODY HAS THEIR OWN MENTALITY, JUST BECAUSE ITS NOT LIKE YOURS DOESNT MAKE IT WRONG. THE ACTORS EVEN THOUGH THEY ARENT KNOWN, THEY DiD A GOOD JOB OF PORTRAYiNG THE CHARACTERS LiFESTYLE! G00D DAY! ~”iF U STARE UP AT THE STARS LONG ENOUGH ANYTHiNG SEEMS POSSiBLE”~
pamela says:
June 25, 2008 at 5:20am
whoever wrote this review must be some white junkie whos never personally seen the life and srtuggle of a young woman coming up in a barrio. i thought this movie captured what being in a gang is like and all the crap that comes along with it. this movie is a modern Mi Vida Loca and it represented a chola’s lifestyle.
so for the person that wrote this shitty critique, get your head out of your ass and learn about the real LOCA culture watch the movie again (and this time pay attention) you are not watching The fucking Hills.
LP says:
December 16, 2008 at 3:34pm
Hey, i really liked this movie a lot….i really really want to find that stupid danger zone song! but i cant anywhere, i know a lot of other people said they couldnt but if u know what its called and where i can get it. let me know!
Someone says:
March 15, 2009 at 8:03pm
Gooood movie!!
who sings that song danger zone?
does anyone know where I can get the soundtrack??
Jus Me says:
August 21, 2009 at 11:13am
Ugh!! I just need to find that damn song “Danger Zone”!! It’s drivin me crazy!!!if u know it plz send it to rishacharley@yahoo.com
stephanie says:
September 18, 2009 at 9:41pm
omg i need to no the song danger zone!….its been months since ive been wanting to know…one of my fav song in the movie….
email me at fanimoreno_246@hotmail.com
Saturday, August 24, 2013
Movie Mistakes
Movie Mistakes is a regularly updated website that points out the numerous continuity errors that plague movies & TV shows alike.
Friday, August 23, 2013
The Old Corral
The Old Corral is an exhaustively researched and authoritative guide to the world of B Movie Westerns especially during the period 1929-1954.
Aaron Swartz was a Scumbag
Hacking is the same thing as breaking and entering one's home. As Declan McCullough wrote back in the late 1990's, there is no such thing as "hacktivism", only vandalism.
What gets me about this case is the way that his father has been acting. He talks as if MIT committed a great sin by alerting law enforcement to his son's crimes.
He was recently the subject of an article in the Chicago Sun-Times as saying that MIT needed to apologize for its actions and to do what his son wanted them to do: make journal articles and academic journals free of charge. Given the fact that academic journals are pretty expensive to publish, if they were made free, pretty soon there would be no more academic journals around.
Aaron Swartz was a scumbag no different than kidnappers and other kinds of violent hoodlums.
What gets me about this case is the way that his father has been acting. He talks as if MIT committed a great sin by alerting law enforcement to his son's crimes.
He was recently the subject of an article in the Chicago Sun-Times as saying that MIT needed to apologize for its actions and to do what his son wanted them to do: make journal articles and academic journals free of charge. Given the fact that academic journals are pretty expensive to publish, if they were made free, pretty soon there would be no more academic journals around.
Aaron Swartz was a scumbag no different than kidnappers and other kinds of violent hoodlums.
Deadpit Horror Talk Radio
Deadpit Horror Talk Radio is an internet radio program/station that specializes in covering horror with a special emphasis on movies. Deadpit is run by the self styled "innovators of horror talk radio" who call themselves "Crazy Kentuckian" & "Uncle Buck" and who are sometimes called "thrillbillies" on their website.
HorrorHound
HorrorHound is a magazine about horror movies that since its inception has quickly become one of the leading magazines of its kind. It has done so largely by running articles on subjects that other horror flick magazines generally do not publish.
Rue Morgue
Rue Morgue is a Canada based print magazine devoted to horror movies. Website features include a busy forum, staff blog, internet radio program/station and a sizable links section under the "friends" heading.
House Forsaken is Dead
In the early days of Solar Empre, June-October, 1999 House Forsaken was the mightiest clan in the game. At least that is until the likes of the Evil Empire, TalkHouse & the Trex Mercenaries showed up. Even then, HF's position was strong enough that in January 2000 SE creator/developer/operator Bryan Livingston awarded them their own SE game that was admined by HF members. HF was also a multi-game outfit that also had strong clans in other major online games such as at Battle.net and in Everquest.
However, HF succumbed to hubris and became too big for its britches. This happened in March, 2003 in the game of TDZK that was created/developed/operated by HF members Jerle & Hotaru. In that game 2 HF members, one of whom named Hyperion had played SE under the name of HY and who had originally been a HF recruit in SE (and if a certain story is true played SE with HF back in late 1999 under the name of -=WindKull=-), were caught brazenly cheating. In a related incident in the same month, Hyperion committed treason by destroying a HF planet (Planet OMGN).
Since HF prided itself as being a clan that claimed to have honor at the very core of its being and repeatedly used the idea that it was a honorable outfit in its recruiting that was firmly opposed to cheating, one have thought that the HF leadership would have come down hard on the cheaters. Instead the opposite happened. The leadership acted as if nothing bad happened and that, if anything, the real culprits were those who brought the cheating to the attention of the clan. Additionally, the leadership failed to provide even the slightest discipline to Hyperion for his SE treason.
The end result of all this was the mass resignation of almost every member of the HF Browser-Based Gaming Realm and with that the single most active unit within HF ceased to exist. From that point on, HF went into a state of decline and fall and after years of being little more than a glorified "forum clan" has ceased to exist.
However, HF succumbed to hubris and became too big for its britches. This happened in March, 2003 in the game of TDZK that was created/developed/operated by HF members Jerle & Hotaru. In that game 2 HF members, one of whom named Hyperion had played SE under the name of HY and who had originally been a HF recruit in SE (and if a certain story is true played SE with HF back in late 1999 under the name of -=WindKull=-), were caught brazenly cheating. In a related incident in the same month, Hyperion committed treason by destroying a HF planet (Planet OMGN).
Since HF prided itself as being a clan that claimed to have honor at the very core of its being and repeatedly used the idea that it was a honorable outfit in its recruiting that was firmly opposed to cheating, one have thought that the HF leadership would have come down hard on the cheaters. Instead the opposite happened. The leadership acted as if nothing bad happened and that, if anything, the real culprits were those who brought the cheating to the attention of the clan. Additionally, the leadership failed to provide even the slightest discipline to Hyperion for his SE treason.
The end result of all this was the mass resignation of almost every member of the HF Browser-Based Gaming Realm and with that the single most active unit within HF ceased to exist. From that point on, HF went into a state of decline and fall and after years of being little more than a glorified "forum clan" has ceased to exist.
Monday, August 19, 2013
The New York Synergy Group
The New York Film Synergy Group is an organization dedicated to helping folks who are interested in all aspects of independent film making connect and come to collaborate together on projects.
Eileen Dietz
Eileen Dietz is an accomplished horror movie actress whose career has largely consisted of roles in low budget movies and direct to video flicks.
Air Speed (1998)
Over the years, a consensus has formed among movie buffs that the 1959 flick “Plan 9 From Outer Space” is the absolute worst movie ever made. So firm is this consensus that a certifiable cult has grown up around both this movie and its writer/director/producer Edward D. Wood, Jr. Wood’s life has been chronicled in books, ducumentaries and even a feature length film directed by Tim Burton with Johnny Depp playing the awful filmmaker.
Now, however, there is a recent flick that bids well to replace Plan 9 in the Hollywood hall of shame. This is the 1998 movie Air Speed that is a disaster flick in more ways than one. This movie is so goofy that it makes 1980’s “Airplane!” look like a serious drama by comparison.
Elisha Cuthbert stars as Nicole, who is one of the most spoiled rotten brats ever to besmirch the silver screen. Nicole is 13 years old and her proudest achievement in life thus far is the sheer number of elite boarding schools for rich little girls that she’s been kicked out of. She is completely alienated from her parents and for good reason. Her parents care only for making as much money as they can and spend as little time with her as they can.
However, due to her misbehavior, they have arranged for her to come home on their private jet which looks a lot like a large passenger aircraft. She is confined to a huge room that could not possibly fit into even the biggest aircraft known to man. In this room are 2 folks who are best described as Dull Man & Dull Woman, both of whom give the impression that they’d rather be dead than be with Nicole.
As the fickle fingers of Fate would have it, the guys in the cockpit pilot the aircraft straight into a storm just 5 minutes away from the airport. Lightning strikes the plane, sending blue lights that the filmmakers intended to simulate high voltage throughout the plane. Everyone on the plane dies on the spot except for Nicole who is miraculously spared without a scratch. The lightning blows a huge hole on the side of the plane where the room is, yet there is no wind inside the airplane or air suction. Clearly, God is on Nicole’s side.
The guys in what must be the world’s shortest airport control tower are not exactly panicked. The air traffic controller is a Hairy Guy who looks more like a street vagrant than a seasoned professional. Enter the parents who act as if the whole thing is an inconvenience for them. The father is especially pathetic since he acts as if his daughter’s being in mortal peril is no more bothersome to him than if he had been told that his luggage would be delayed a little bit.
Hairy Guy concocts some schemes to rescue Nicole involving a air tanker. In one scheme, the tanker’s arm is to extend into the hole into the stricken aircraft and a guy on the tanker is to walk across the arm like a circus trapeze artist at 20,000 feet or so above the Earth with both planes flying at high rates of speed. Yes, you read that right. When that idea doesn’t work, Hairy Guy comes up with the idea of having Nicole’s plane land on top of the tanker. Yes, you read that right too. Even though the automatic pilot obligingly shut itself down, this gambit fails to work.
The tanker is forced to withdraw due to turbulence and then everything goes wrong. The automatic pilot comes back to life, so poor Nicole can’t continue her flying lessons. The radio and cell phone both go dead, so she can’t talk to Hairy Guy anymore. Then, the air in the plane suddenly realized that when there is a hole in the side of the plane, there is supposed to be air suction and before you know it, one of Nicole’s expensive shoes is flying out into the atmosphere and her hair becomes all messed up.
Now, if this was anything like real life, the throughly unlikeable little brat would get herself killed trying to land the plane. However, this is Hollywood and Nicole is quickly able to solve all her problems simply by banging the controls with a baseball bat. The automatic pilot shuts off and the air suction comes to an end. What happens next should be easily predictable by even the most naive movie fans.
Air Speed is a disaster. Unless, you want to spend your time deciding if this really is worse than Plan 9, avoid it at all costs.
Now, however, there is a recent flick that bids well to replace Plan 9 in the Hollywood hall of shame. This is the 1998 movie Air Speed that is a disaster flick in more ways than one. This movie is so goofy that it makes 1980’s “Airplane!” look like a serious drama by comparison.
Elisha Cuthbert stars as Nicole, who is one of the most spoiled rotten brats ever to besmirch the silver screen. Nicole is 13 years old and her proudest achievement in life thus far is the sheer number of elite boarding schools for rich little girls that she’s been kicked out of. She is completely alienated from her parents and for good reason. Her parents care only for making as much money as they can and spend as little time with her as they can.
However, due to her misbehavior, they have arranged for her to come home on their private jet which looks a lot like a large passenger aircraft. She is confined to a huge room that could not possibly fit into even the biggest aircraft known to man. In this room are 2 folks who are best described as Dull Man & Dull Woman, both of whom give the impression that they’d rather be dead than be with Nicole.
As the fickle fingers of Fate would have it, the guys in the cockpit pilot the aircraft straight into a storm just 5 minutes away from the airport. Lightning strikes the plane, sending blue lights that the filmmakers intended to simulate high voltage throughout the plane. Everyone on the plane dies on the spot except for Nicole who is miraculously spared without a scratch. The lightning blows a huge hole on the side of the plane where the room is, yet there is no wind inside the airplane or air suction. Clearly, God is on Nicole’s side.
The guys in what must be the world’s shortest airport control tower are not exactly panicked. The air traffic controller is a Hairy Guy who looks more like a street vagrant than a seasoned professional. Enter the parents who act as if the whole thing is an inconvenience for them. The father is especially pathetic since he acts as if his daughter’s being in mortal peril is no more bothersome to him than if he had been told that his luggage would be delayed a little bit.
Hairy Guy concocts some schemes to rescue Nicole involving a air tanker. In one scheme, the tanker’s arm is to extend into the hole into the stricken aircraft and a guy on the tanker is to walk across the arm like a circus trapeze artist at 20,000 feet or so above the Earth with both planes flying at high rates of speed. Yes, you read that right. When that idea doesn’t work, Hairy Guy comes up with the idea of having Nicole’s plane land on top of the tanker. Yes, you read that right too. Even though the automatic pilot obligingly shut itself down, this gambit fails to work.
The tanker is forced to withdraw due to turbulence and then everything goes wrong. The automatic pilot comes back to life, so poor Nicole can’t continue her flying lessons. The radio and cell phone both go dead, so she can’t talk to Hairy Guy anymore. Then, the air in the plane suddenly realized that when there is a hole in the side of the plane, there is supposed to be air suction and before you know it, one of Nicole’s expensive shoes is flying out into the atmosphere and her hair becomes all messed up.
Now, if this was anything like real life, the throughly unlikeable little brat would get herself killed trying to land the plane. However, this is Hollywood and Nicole is quickly able to solve all her problems simply by banging the controls with a baseball bat. The automatic pilot shuts off and the air suction comes to an end. What happens next should be easily predictable by even the most naive movie fans.
Air Speed is a disaster. Unless, you want to spend your time deciding if this really is worse than Plan 9, avoid it at all costs.
Hollywood Elsewhere
Hollywood Elsewhere is a movie blog by outspoken atheist Jeffrey Wells who revels in his knowledge of movie industry trivia. Wells also advocates blacklisting anyone in Hollywood who disagrees with the political views of the Hollywood establishment.
Sunday, August 18, 2013
Final Girl
Final Girl is a blog by Stacie Ponder who mainly focuses in on horror movies with a preference for reviewing splatter flicks. Ponder also writes about such things as comic books, fandom and takes photographs that she posts on her blog.
Karen Black RIP
Karen Black passed away recently and as usual the news media messed things up as shown by the obituary in the August 9th Chicago Sun-Times. The paper's piece focused on Blacks few major motion picture credits. As everyone familiar with Black's career knows, it was in made for TV movies and low budget movies that she really shined.
Black starred in such classic flicks as Burnt Offerings, Killer Fish, Killing Heat, The Hooker Cult Murders & Trilogy of Terror. To be sure, Black also had her share of turkeys such as Airport 1975, Capricorn One, House of 1000 Corpses, Invaders from Mars & The Day of the Locust.
Karen Black most definitely will be missed.
Black starred in such classic flicks as Burnt Offerings, Killer Fish, Killing Heat, The Hooker Cult Murders & Trilogy of Terror. To be sure, Black also had her share of turkeys such as Airport 1975, Capricorn One, House of 1000 Corpses, Invaders from Mars & The Day of the Locust.
Karen Black most definitely will be missed.
Saturday, August 17, 2013
Model Lust (2003) aka The New Girl [Video release title]
Espionage and fashion modeling have long been subjects for movies. However, its rare that both of these glamorous occupations would play equally important roles in the same movie. This is what makes the strangely fascinating made for TV movie The New Girl unique. This is one flick with no-talent actors and actresses, but an original story even if it is rather flaky.
The movie opens in an unnamed Midwestern town where this blond chick named Arielle (Juliana Kincaid) is preparing to move to Los Angeles where she will attend college majoring in history while living with her glamorous fashion model cousin Tracy (Diana Espen). Her boyfriend shows up with engagement ring in hand in a desperate attempt to persuade her to stay with him. She tells him that she wants to be a public school teacher and the only way to do that is move to Southern California and live the high life with her cousin while going to school with the sons and daughters of movie stars.
Arielle moves in with her glamorous cousin and before you know it, she’s a model herself. Arielle learns that in order to make it in the modeling business, you have to engage in immoral acts with the photographers and the other persons at the agency, irregardless of how they look or behave. You also have to engage in immorality with whomever they tell you to. Since she’s getting paid $5,000 a week irregardless of whether she does any work or not, that does not seem like a bad deal to Arielle, especially since she can put the seduction techniques that she’s been taught at the modeling agency to good use making sure that she gets great grades regardless of whether or not she actually attends classes or does any homework. Life is sweet for Arielle.
That is, until the cable guy shows up when Arielle is alone at home. He identifies himself as Special Agent Brewster of the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) and takes her downtown to FBI HQ in Los Angeles. There, she is informed of the awful truth behind the glamorous modeling agency. For instance, the premiere photographer with a French accent is actually an Italian guy whose vocal cords were surgically altered so he pass himself off as being French. The models are actually members of a “seduction squad” that picks up intelligence for terrorists who are planning a reign of terror in LA. The models have been brainwashed into becoming the pawns of the terrorists and they have some way of gaining top secret materials and then sending it to the terrorists that the FBI has not been able to figure out. The FBI tells Arielle that since she’s new on the job, she has not been brainwashed yet, but her cousin has been. The FBI makes an offer to Arielle that if she works for them, they will spare Tracy and on top of that, de-brainwash her. Naturally, Arielle agrees.
Arielle proves a pro at spying on her fellow models. She discovers their secret lines of communication. You see, the models take darts with them on their seduction missions. After they render their marks unconscious, they hitch the darts up to their laptop computers and download their files. They then open the window and throw out the darts. Each dart has miniature rocket engines and they fly off to the waiting terrorists. Arielle provides the FBI with the goods and the FBI brings down the curtain on the evil enemies and their putrid plot. End of movie.
Despite the fact that The New Girl borders on being a pornographic flick (its R rating should have been NC-17), its a surprisingly fun flick despite its unlikely plot. At least it is far more original than big budget movies and has very nice cinematography. However, due to the facts that this writer was able to pick it up for $1, this is one obscure movie. It deserves better.
Script: 9
Acting: 1
Cinematography: 10
Originality: 10
Reviewer’s Tilt: 8
Overall Grade: 7.6
Mr. Rock 'n' Roll (1999)
Over the years, made for TV movies have taken a major fall in quality. Originally, they were made with much the same production values as the movies that were made for theaters. There were even cases of movies such as “The Killers” starring Lee Marvin & Angie Dickinson and the “Battlestar Galactica” pilot movie and a 1966 “Dragnet” movie, among others, that were originally made for TV but were released in theaters and made lots of money in the process. The “Battlestar Galactica” movie’s success was perhaps the most notable of these successes since it had aired on free network TV in the Fall of 1978, yet less than a year later in the Summer of 1979, it was a major hit in theaters.
However, ever since circa 1985, the quality of made for TV movies have severely declined to the point where many folks automatically assume that if a show is a made for TV movie, then its automatically no good. Nowadays, made for TV movies have cheap production values and have glossy looks to them. There is even a term of derision that is often applied to theater movies that critics do not like: TV Movie Syndrome.
TV Movie Syndrome concerns bland, homogenized products that are mixed in a blender with previous made for TV movies and then the results have a cookie cutter applied to it. These movies may be ostensibly different from each other, but essentially they are the same exact thing, only with different labels attached to them. None of the characters have any rough edges or interesting quirks. As a result, they come across as being humanoid robots. Subleties and nuances in the stories are glossed over. When you add it all up, you get something that is movie length, but really is not a movie.
The absolute worst made for TV movies are what are unfortunately the most common type of TV movie. That is, ripoffs of better movies from yesteryear. In the case of the movie at hand Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll, what you have is a 1999 ripoff of a 1978 theater movie, “American Hot Wax” that was nothing short of dreadful. The amazing thing is that as awful as the 1978 original was, Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll has somehow managed to be even worse than the original. Such is the state of made for TV movies today.
Judd Nelson stars as Alan Freed, a disc jockey in Cleveland who recognized early on that rock and roll was not just some fad. In real life, Freed was a sleazy character who claimed that he created rock music and whose claims were repeated by largely gullible reporters. Freed associated with a number of unsavory characters including mobsters. In Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll, Freed is the dullest man alive who is married to the dullest woman alive. Needless to say, Freed in real life was a far more interesting character than what he comes across in this TV movie.
The incredible thing is that Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll repeats all the mistakes that “American Hot Wax” made 21 years earlier. Freed is made out to be some sort of civil rights crusader, which is ridiculous. For instance, Freed is made out to be the victim of evil law enforcement agencies. This show even has FBI director J. Edgar Hoover saying that rock music is even more of a threat to America than Communism. There is nothing in Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll about the fact that in 1962 Freed pleaded guilty to 2 counts of payola. Nor was there anything about the fact that Freed’s death in 1965 has been shrouded in mystery and controversy with many believing that he was murdered as opposed to the official findings that he had died of natural causes.
The real life story of Alan Freed is most interesting and could be the subject of a great movie. Its bad enough that Freed was the subject of a bad movie in 1978. Its even worse that it was the subject of a poor grade made for TV movie in 1999. Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll is a movie to avoid like the plague.
However, ever since circa 1985, the quality of made for TV movies have severely declined to the point where many folks automatically assume that if a show is a made for TV movie, then its automatically no good. Nowadays, made for TV movies have cheap production values and have glossy looks to them. There is even a term of derision that is often applied to theater movies that critics do not like: TV Movie Syndrome.
TV Movie Syndrome concerns bland, homogenized products that are mixed in a blender with previous made for TV movies and then the results have a cookie cutter applied to it. These movies may be ostensibly different from each other, but essentially they are the same exact thing, only with different labels attached to them. None of the characters have any rough edges or interesting quirks. As a result, they come across as being humanoid robots. Subleties and nuances in the stories are glossed over. When you add it all up, you get something that is movie length, but really is not a movie.
The absolute worst made for TV movies are what are unfortunately the most common type of TV movie. That is, ripoffs of better movies from yesteryear. In the case of the movie at hand Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll, what you have is a 1999 ripoff of a 1978 theater movie, “American Hot Wax” that was nothing short of dreadful. The amazing thing is that as awful as the 1978 original was, Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll has somehow managed to be even worse than the original. Such is the state of made for TV movies today.
Judd Nelson stars as Alan Freed, a disc jockey in Cleveland who recognized early on that rock and roll was not just some fad. In real life, Freed was a sleazy character who claimed that he created rock music and whose claims were repeated by largely gullible reporters. Freed associated with a number of unsavory characters including mobsters. In Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll, Freed is the dullest man alive who is married to the dullest woman alive. Needless to say, Freed in real life was a far more interesting character than what he comes across in this TV movie.
The incredible thing is that Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll repeats all the mistakes that “American Hot Wax” made 21 years earlier. Freed is made out to be some sort of civil rights crusader, which is ridiculous. For instance, Freed is made out to be the victim of evil law enforcement agencies. This show even has FBI director J. Edgar Hoover saying that rock music is even more of a threat to America than Communism. There is nothing in Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll about the fact that in 1962 Freed pleaded guilty to 2 counts of payola. Nor was there anything about the fact that Freed’s death in 1965 has been shrouded in mystery and controversy with many believing that he was murdered as opposed to the official findings that he had died of natural causes.
The real life story of Alan Freed is most interesting and could be the subject of a great movie. Its bad enough that Freed was the subject of a bad movie in 1978. Its even worse that it was the subject of a poor grade made for TV movie in 1999. Mr. Rock ‘n’ Roll is a movie to avoid like the plague.
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Land of the Dead (2005)
If there ever was a flick that was over hyped during the 2005 summer movie season, it was the more or less remake of the 1985 zombie horror movie “Day of the Dead.” The original flick was ridiculous, overly long and an obviously cheap jack disaster. It was and is not a classic in any way. The 2005 version is the same as the original, except that its budget was much larger.
The only real difference between the two movies is that Day of the Dead concerned an underground bunker, Land of the Dead is about a walled city. This city is Pittsburgh, PA where the city’s elite reside in a skyscraper named “Fiddler’s Green.” There is no explanation in the flick on just how the city can survive despite the lack of sufficient farm land to sustain the inhabitants.
The world of Land of the Dead is an implausibly horrific one. Since the rest of the world has been overrun by undead zombies, the living have all gotten themselves holed up in the walled city of Pittsburgh. The wealthy all live in skyscrapers like Fiddler’s Green while everyone else have to tough it out on the streets.
Even more implausible is the nature of the walled city of Pittsburgh’s defense force. The defense is built around a single tank called “Dead Reckoning.” The men of the defense force are all mercenaries who were hired by the city’s leadership to defend the city from zombie attack. You would think that there would be more than just one tank to protect the city. Even worse is the idea that in a future when there is only one bastion of non-zombie humanity left, then there would be no need to hire mercenaries since the citizens would willingly volunteer to man the barricades. Besides all this, since the mercenaries were all hired from outside the city, then would that not mean that there must be other islands of freedom safe from the rampaging zombies? Clearly, this was not a well thought out aspect of Land of the Dead.
Even more poorly thought out is the ethnic and racial stereotyping that permeates Land of the Dead. It has slum dwelling Irish folk, an angry black man zombie and a loudmouthed young Puerto Rican. In addition to the stereotyping, there are tons of awful dialogue.
Essentially, Land of the Dead is a stupid movie that was obviously made for the sole purpose of making lots and lots of money. There clearly was zero artistic reasons for this movie and zero artistry was invested in it. Basically, the movie moguls behind it thought that they could pull a fast one on the movie going public and reap huge dividends. Thankfully, they miscalculated and Land of the Dead turned out to be a disappointment at the box office. If you decide to rent this movie out, you will be disappointed as well, unless you are really into bad movies.
The only real difference between the two movies is that Day of the Dead concerned an underground bunker, Land of the Dead is about a walled city. This city is Pittsburgh, PA where the city’s elite reside in a skyscraper named “Fiddler’s Green.” There is no explanation in the flick on just how the city can survive despite the lack of sufficient farm land to sustain the inhabitants.
The world of Land of the Dead is an implausibly horrific one. Since the rest of the world has been overrun by undead zombies, the living have all gotten themselves holed up in the walled city of Pittsburgh. The wealthy all live in skyscrapers like Fiddler’s Green while everyone else have to tough it out on the streets.
Even more implausible is the nature of the walled city of Pittsburgh’s defense force. The defense is built around a single tank called “Dead Reckoning.” The men of the defense force are all mercenaries who were hired by the city’s leadership to defend the city from zombie attack. You would think that there would be more than just one tank to protect the city. Even worse is the idea that in a future when there is only one bastion of non-zombie humanity left, then there would be no need to hire mercenaries since the citizens would willingly volunteer to man the barricades. Besides all this, since the mercenaries were all hired from outside the city, then would that not mean that there must be other islands of freedom safe from the rampaging zombies? Clearly, this was not a well thought out aspect of Land of the Dead.
Even more poorly thought out is the ethnic and racial stereotyping that permeates Land of the Dead. It has slum dwelling Irish folk, an angry black man zombie and a loudmouthed young Puerto Rican. In addition to the stereotyping, there are tons of awful dialogue.
Essentially, Land of the Dead is a stupid movie that was obviously made for the sole purpose of making lots and lots of money. There clearly was zero artistic reasons for this movie and zero artistry was invested in it. Basically, the movie moguls behind it thought that they could pull a fast one on the movie going public and reap huge dividends. Thankfully, they miscalculated and Land of the Dead turned out to be a disappointment at the box office. If you decide to rent this movie out, you will be disappointed as well, unless you are really into bad movies.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Serenity (2005)
Usually, when a TV show is made into a movie, the movie version is pretty bad. There have been several recent examples of this trend such as Sgt. Bilko & McHale’s Navy. One recent theatrical movie that bucked this longstanding Hollywood tendency is the 2005 flick Serenity that is the movie version of the short lived science fiction TV series Firefly.
Firefly was hands down the single best TV show of this decade/century thus far. Firefly displayed great humor, well written dialog and there was excellent chemistry among the crew. The scenes around the dinner table were truly wonderful. Firefly was conceived as a “space western.” It invoked the concept of space as the final frontier as well as the original “Star Trek” and Firefly was far superior to any of the latter Star Trek series. Firefly was a great science fiction show full of that sense of wonder for which that you read/watch SF in the first place. Hopefully, the rumors of a new season of Firefly being produced for distribution on DVD turn out to be true.
Unlike most other movies based on TV shows, Serenity keeps practically the entire TV cast in the movie. As a result, there is nary a big time movie star in the entire flick. This helps give Serenity the feeling of a breath of fresh air instead of being more of the same old same old.
The movie’s name derives from the name of the ship Serenity. The crew of the Serenity is strictly mercenary and will take on any job regardless of its legality or morality. This includes assassinations, burglary and smuggling. The galaxy is ruled by The Alliance that achieved its position by winning a galactic war. Complicating matters is the fact that the captain of the Serenity, Malcolm Reynolds (Nathan Fillion), was on the losing side in that war.
As a result of this defeat, both Captain Reynolds and the Serenity spend most of their existence hovering on the far frontier hoping to stay out of the clutches of the victorious Alliance for as long as possible. This helps give Serenity a “space western” feel. To a great extent, Serenity is a futuristic version of the Wild West of yore.
If anything, life on the space frontier is even more perilous than it was on the Western frontier. This is because of the Reavers who are humans who have been gone crazy and have become cannibals. The movie starts with the crew of the Serenity pulling a bank heist only to wind up in the path of a marauding band of Reavers. Additionally, the crew of the Serenity are protecting a girl who they rescued from a sinister laboratory run by the glactic government. Needless to say, Serenity packs a lot of action in one film.
Serenity is a fun flick and as such is very well done. The fact that there are hardly any movie stars in the film adds to the fun and does not result in a production with acting values that are lower than most motion pictures. Unlike most science fiction movies, Serenity combines both good special effects with both a strong story and character development. Serenity is a great example of how science fiction films should be made and as such is warmly recommended.
Firefly was hands down the single best TV show of this decade/century thus far. Firefly displayed great humor, well written dialog and there was excellent chemistry among the crew. The scenes around the dinner table were truly wonderful. Firefly was conceived as a “space western.” It invoked the concept of space as the final frontier as well as the original “Star Trek” and Firefly was far superior to any of the latter Star Trek series. Firefly was a great science fiction show full of that sense of wonder for which that you read/watch SF in the first place. Hopefully, the rumors of a new season of Firefly being produced for distribution on DVD turn out to be true.
Unlike most other movies based on TV shows, Serenity keeps practically the entire TV cast in the movie. As a result, there is nary a big time movie star in the entire flick. This helps give Serenity the feeling of a breath of fresh air instead of being more of the same old same old.
The movie’s name derives from the name of the ship Serenity. The crew of the Serenity is strictly mercenary and will take on any job regardless of its legality or morality. This includes assassinations, burglary and smuggling. The galaxy is ruled by The Alliance that achieved its position by winning a galactic war. Complicating matters is the fact that the captain of the Serenity, Malcolm Reynolds (Nathan Fillion), was on the losing side in that war.
As a result of this defeat, both Captain Reynolds and the Serenity spend most of their existence hovering on the far frontier hoping to stay out of the clutches of the victorious Alliance for as long as possible. This helps give Serenity a “space western” feel. To a great extent, Serenity is a futuristic version of the Wild West of yore.
If anything, life on the space frontier is even more perilous than it was on the Western frontier. This is because of the Reavers who are humans who have been gone crazy and have become cannibals. The movie starts with the crew of the Serenity pulling a bank heist only to wind up in the path of a marauding band of Reavers. Additionally, the crew of the Serenity are protecting a girl who they rescued from a sinister laboratory run by the glactic government. Needless to say, Serenity packs a lot of action in one film.
Serenity is a fun flick and as such is very well done. The fact that there are hardly any movie stars in the film adds to the fun and does not result in a production with acting values that are lower than most motion pictures. Unlike most science fiction movies, Serenity combines both good special effects with both a strong story and character development. Serenity is a great example of how science fiction films should be made and as such is warmly recommended.
Chicago Sun-Times Conveniently Leaves Out Part of the Dennis Farina Story
The Chicago Sun-Times has been running quite a bit of material about the late beloved actor Dennis Farina. However, there is one thing that has been quite conveniently left out of the coverage: Farina's politics were well to the right and he was a Republican. This from a newspaper that has long published the political affiliation of GOP politicians who get into trouble while conveniently never mentioning it whenever Democrats are scandal afflicted. There have even been times when Democrats have become embroiled in scandal and the CST has misidentified them as being Republicans.
And to think that the CST calls itself an "independent newspaper" when in fact it is partisan to the point of refusing to print the truth about the dearly departed.
And to think that the CST calls itself an "independent newspaper" when in fact it is partisan to the point of refusing to print the truth about the dearly departed.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Lawless (2012)
Almost always when Hollywood makes movies about the Prohibition Era, the action is set in the big cities. This has always seemed strange in light of the fact that the bulk of the illicit liquor was made in the countryside and then smuggled into the big cities. Also, when the liquor was made in big city stills, the raw materials came from rural areas. In other words, if it were not for the collaboration of rural criminals with their urban counterparts, Prohibition would have been a success and might still be the law of the land even today.
Lawless is based on the real life story of the Bondurant brothers of Virginia. Before Prohibition, the Bondurant family had been noted for its lawlessness and violence. Prohibition would show that the Bondurants were able to hold their own against both big city racketeers and corrupt so-called law enforcers alike.
Unfortunately Lawless is not as interesting as the historical events that inspired it. This is a slow, boring flick with but little of redeeming value. Its surprising just how dull this movie is given the excessive level of violence and killing just for the sake of killing that there is in this film. There is also a gratuitous amount of what can only be called "torture porn" in Lawless.
There is little real plot or story to this flick. Strangely, given all the violence there is also very little real suspense. This despite the fact that there is one scene in which a man is tarred and feathered much like what happened to British tax collectors during the events preceding the American Revolution. The combination of gratuitous violence with characters who are all unsympathetic, unlikable and uninteresting makes for one boring movie.
Perhaps the most disappointing aspect of Lawless is the actors who chose to be associated with this kind of garbage. These are Gary Oldman and Guy Pearce who have held down prestigious roles in far better movies. It is painfully clear that they agreed to be in this horrible flick only for the paycheck as shown by the fact that their performances were clearly phoned in.
Even worse is the fact that Shia LaBeouf is in this movie. Shia LaBeouf plays the lead role as Jack Bondurant. As in his previous movies, this guy is a mess. He simply cannot do a convincing southern accent. How he ever became such a prominent Hollywood figure is difficult to understand.
All in all, Lawless is a disappointment. What could have been a historically sound action packed thriller is a flick that is loaded with all sorts of mindless sex and violence with little in the way of a coherent plot or quality acting. Lawless is nothing more than a piece of trash and as such it ought to be avoided like the plague.
Lawless is based on the real life story of the Bondurant brothers of Virginia. Before Prohibition, the Bondurant family had been noted for its lawlessness and violence. Prohibition would show that the Bondurants were able to hold their own against both big city racketeers and corrupt so-called law enforcers alike.
Unfortunately Lawless is not as interesting as the historical events that inspired it. This is a slow, boring flick with but little of redeeming value. Its surprising just how dull this movie is given the excessive level of violence and killing just for the sake of killing that there is in this film. There is also a gratuitous amount of what can only be called "torture porn" in Lawless.
There is little real plot or story to this flick. Strangely, given all the violence there is also very little real suspense. This despite the fact that there is one scene in which a man is tarred and feathered much like what happened to British tax collectors during the events preceding the American Revolution. The combination of gratuitous violence with characters who are all unsympathetic, unlikable and uninteresting makes for one boring movie.
Perhaps the most disappointing aspect of Lawless is the actors who chose to be associated with this kind of garbage. These are Gary Oldman and Guy Pearce who have held down prestigious roles in far better movies. It is painfully clear that they agreed to be in this horrible flick only for the paycheck as shown by the fact that their performances were clearly phoned in.
Even worse is the fact that Shia LaBeouf is in this movie. Shia LaBeouf plays the lead role as Jack Bondurant. As in his previous movies, this guy is a mess. He simply cannot do a convincing southern accent. How he ever became such a prominent Hollywood figure is difficult to understand.
All in all, Lawless is a disappointment. What could have been a historically sound action packed thriller is a flick that is loaded with all sorts of mindless sex and violence with little in the way of a coherent plot or quality acting. Lawless is nothing more than a piece of trash and as such it ought to be avoided like the plague.
The Expendables 2 (2012)
The producers of The Expendables 2 have done the seemingly impossible. They have made a movie that is even worse than the original The Expendables. And the sequel was worse than the original despite the addition of Chuck Norris to the cast. This movie was nearly unbearable with all too many former action stars that you hardly care about anymore doing things that just simply are not believable. The plot was stupid in the extreme and things got to the point where you hardly knew just what was supposed to be going on.
At the beginning of this movie, some of the Expendables mercenary outfit execute an operation designed to free an allegedly innocent man named Trench (Arnold Schwarzenegger) from a Nepalese prison. Trench is a haggard looking character who turns out to be both extremely dangerous and anything but innocent. After this mission, Mr. Church (Bruce Willis) informs the Expendables theat they need to seek revenge for a fallen compatriot.
So they go to Russia to keep him from getting Russian nukes to sell on the open market. Believe me, I’m making it sound better than it is. Far better. So much action, so boring and stupid. And the addition of Chuck Norris does not make it any better.
When things go wrong, the Expendables are compelled to seek revenge in hostile territory, where the odds are stacked against them. Hell-bent on payback, the crew cuts a swath of destruction through opposing forces, wreaking havoc and shutting down an unexpected threat in the nick of time - five tons of weapons-grade plutonium, more than enough to change the balance of power in the world. But that's nothing compared to the justice they serve against the villainous adversary they seek revenge from.
From this point on, The Expendables 2 becomes nothing more than an exercise in all too predictable action filmmaking. There are ony two things that are surprising about this flick. First off, just how boring a movie can be when there is so much death, explosions and shooting going on. The second is just how boring and confusing that a movie can get to be at the same time.
The Expendables 2 is a horrible excuse in movie making. It is an exercise in highly predictable paint by the numbers film making. The actors are all over the hill losers who are in this particular flick strictly for the paycheck. The plot, along with the screenplay, was stupid in the extreme. The production values were simply not there. To put things mildly, The Expendables 2 is a movie that you need to avoid like the plague.
At the beginning of this movie, some of the Expendables mercenary outfit execute an operation designed to free an allegedly innocent man named Trench (Arnold Schwarzenegger) from a Nepalese prison. Trench is a haggard looking character who turns out to be both extremely dangerous and anything but innocent. After this mission, Mr. Church (Bruce Willis) informs the Expendables theat they need to seek revenge for a fallen compatriot.
So they go to Russia to keep him from getting Russian nukes to sell on the open market. Believe me, I’m making it sound better than it is. Far better. So much action, so boring and stupid. And the addition of Chuck Norris does not make it any better.
When things go wrong, the Expendables are compelled to seek revenge in hostile territory, where the odds are stacked against them. Hell-bent on payback, the crew cuts a swath of destruction through opposing forces, wreaking havoc and shutting down an unexpected threat in the nick of time - five tons of weapons-grade plutonium, more than enough to change the balance of power in the world. But that's nothing compared to the justice they serve against the villainous adversary they seek revenge from.
From this point on, The Expendables 2 becomes nothing more than an exercise in all too predictable action filmmaking. There are ony two things that are surprising about this flick. First off, just how boring a movie can be when there is so much death, explosions and shooting going on. The second is just how boring and confusing that a movie can get to be at the same time.
The Expendables 2 is a horrible excuse in movie making. It is an exercise in highly predictable paint by the numbers film making. The actors are all over the hill losers who are in this particular flick strictly for the paycheck. The plot, along with the screenplay, was stupid in the extreme. The production values were simply not there. To put things mildly, The Expendables 2 is a movie that you need to avoid like the plague.
The Expendables (2010)
The Expendables is one of those movies that starts off great and then gets pretty bad really fast. This movie begins with an exciting battle against Somali pirates by a band of American mercenaries. It appeared as if this was going to be a top notch thriller.
Unfortunately, The Expendables turned out to be just another Hollywood flick in which America is evil. Here, the always rotten and up to no good Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) has placed in power a diabolical dictator of a fictitious Latin American country called Vilena. This CIA puppet thug is a mass murderer and is also engaged in smuggling illegal drugs into America. The movie's plot has it that the CIA is involved in this racket.
The plot is most depressing in light of the fact that the creator of The Expendables is none other than Sylvester Stallone. During the 1980's, Stallone was one of America's most outspoken patriots. His Rambo movies were about the struggle of American freedom fighters against godless tyrannical Communism. And now Stallone has made a movie that trashes America. Given the fact that the American people have made Stallone fantastically wealthy, why does he hate America so much?
The plot is also unrealistic. In this movie, Stallone and his fellow mercenaries are paid millions to go around and indiscriminately shoot up all sorts of things and people. In real life, mercenary operations are carefully planned and executed to cost as little as possible in terms of both lives lost and property damaged.
Much of this movie is annoying. Have you ever wanted to see a veteran he-man actor such as Mickey Rourke cry? In The Expendables, you get to see this happen. You also get to see the aging Sylvester Stallone hang on to an airplane zipping through both air and bullets alike. Now that is the kind of scene that threatens your suspension of disbelief. Essentialy, the Expendables is nothing but a glorified reunion of aging action movie stars angling for an easy payday for nothing but a lot of phoned in performances.
However, not all of the performances are worthless. Jason Statham is great as Lee Christmas while Terry Crews is decent as Hale Caesar. The fetching beauty Charisma Carpenter has a bit part in which she shows some real acting talent. The cinematography and special effects are above average.
In the end, The Expendables is a mess. The plot is stupid and makes very little sense. America is evil and the CIA is even worse. The United States of America is apparently behind all evil in the world. Movies like The Expendables help further the hatred of America and American values all around the world. Movies like The Expendables need to be avoided like the plague.
Unfortunately, The Expendables turned out to be just another Hollywood flick in which America is evil. Here, the always rotten and up to no good Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) has placed in power a diabolical dictator of a fictitious Latin American country called Vilena. This CIA puppet thug is a mass murderer and is also engaged in smuggling illegal drugs into America. The movie's plot has it that the CIA is involved in this racket.
The plot is most depressing in light of the fact that the creator of The Expendables is none other than Sylvester Stallone. During the 1980's, Stallone was one of America's most outspoken patriots. His Rambo movies were about the struggle of American freedom fighters against godless tyrannical Communism. And now Stallone has made a movie that trashes America. Given the fact that the American people have made Stallone fantastically wealthy, why does he hate America so much?
The plot is also unrealistic. In this movie, Stallone and his fellow mercenaries are paid millions to go around and indiscriminately shoot up all sorts of things and people. In real life, mercenary operations are carefully planned and executed to cost as little as possible in terms of both lives lost and property damaged.
Much of this movie is annoying. Have you ever wanted to see a veteran he-man actor such as Mickey Rourke cry? In The Expendables, you get to see this happen. You also get to see the aging Sylvester Stallone hang on to an airplane zipping through both air and bullets alike. Now that is the kind of scene that threatens your suspension of disbelief. Essentialy, the Expendables is nothing but a glorified reunion of aging action movie stars angling for an easy payday for nothing but a lot of phoned in performances.
However, not all of the performances are worthless. Jason Statham is great as Lee Christmas while Terry Crews is decent as Hale Caesar. The fetching beauty Charisma Carpenter has a bit part in which she shows some real acting talent. The cinematography and special effects are above average.
In the end, The Expendables is a mess. The plot is stupid and makes very little sense. America is evil and the CIA is even worse. The United States of America is apparently behind all evil in the world. Movies like The Expendables help further the hatred of America and American values all around the world. Movies like The Expendables need to be avoided like the plague.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Richard Roeper Nailed the Lone Ranger
Richard Roeper is not one of the best film critics around. Hell, he is not even a good movie reviewer. However, in the case of the recent abomination "The Lone Ranger" starring Johnny Depp as Tonto, Roeper hit the nail on the head when he wrote that it is both a "big mess" and a "train wreck."
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